1. You don’t like the looks of that sky.
If you are lucky, there will be no rain, sleet, or snow
coming out of those grey clouds. We specialize in blue skies and it rains
mostly late at night here, if at all.
2. Vitamin D withdrawal (sunshine)
Ah, that brilliant golden orb, bathing your skin in warmth
and natural vitamins. If you look outside and wonder where it went; look no
further. We have it right here.
3. You are craving sand gravity
The term “sand gravity” is a well-known phrase with our
regulars; that feeling you get when you settle into your beach chair and decide
to cancel your plans for the rest of the day. Incidentally, wouldn’t that have
made a great ending for the movie Gravity if Sandra Bullock crawled up onto the
shores of Club Orient? Whoa! Is this earth?
4. Your friends at work just don’t understand
I’m referring to annoying your colleagues with stories from
your last vacation to the point where they can't stand you anymore and hide
when they see you coming.
5. You’re cold
Really cold. Always cold. Waking up cold. Going through your
day cold. Going to bed cold. Wondering if your furnace thermostat is lying to
you. Wearing so many layers of clothing, your laundry pile is doubled from the
summer months. At least it’s warm by the dryer.
6. You can’t get off the internet
You belong to six St. Martin Facebook groups and follow
thirty-five like pages. It may seem obsessive to some, but you quietly explain
it keeps you from looking out your window.
7. Culinary frustration
Try as you might, you just can’t make the same croissants
and baguettes you have come to love here at home, so you ask for them at the
supermarket, where they look at you like you are nuts. You confirm this when
you leave the place, screaming obscenities.
8. You engage in pirate fantasies
The bottle of rum you brought back home is empty. Anguish
ensues. You look for a parrot that will perch on your shoulder in pet stores.
They can’t stop laughing.
9. You are dreading the holidays
People ask what your menu for Thanksgiving and Christmas is
going to be and you answer Johnny cakes, conch fritters, and grilled shrimp.
They make other plans, believing you may be losing your mind.
If you are exhibiting at least three of these signs or
symptoms, it is time to come back. Don’t delay! Book a trip now and get some
relief!
